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Come see me and come live with me is two different t’ing
by Julia Holmes

Moving In Together

When Clyde and I got married and started living together, we both thought it would be easy – but let me tell you, it was no walk in the Savannah. To save you some trouble, here are my top tips and advice for when you’re ready to take this step.

Finances

Before you even view a single property, sit down and have a talk about money and how you will be sharing costs. Aside from the mortgage there will be other large purchases like furniture and appliances and even vacations. Also to be considered are monthly utility bills groceries and entertainment. Talking about these expenses in the early stages, and agreeing on who is responsible for what, will prevent many arguments about money down the road.

Cleaning

Well, the house won’t clean itself – just remember that. Sharing the tasks helps make things more manageable. Even taking turns with cleaning the bathroom, mopping the kitchen or doing the laundry can be good habits to develop. Clyde does not leave his clothes on the floor as often, when he realised that he too has to share in the housework.

Furniture/Decor

You might quickly learn that you both have different styles or colour preferences. While you might each have furniture you can bring, they may not go well together and one person may feel bitter that they didn’t get to bring their couch or rug, while the other did. Consider selling some of your older items and using the money from these sales to purchase some new furniture together so you both have a say. Clyde had an old brown recliner that had more tears than I could count, and I had a chair with floral upholstery. They clashed with each other so we got rid of both and now have a new chair that matches with our place.

Habits

When you live under the same roof you learn a lot more intimate details about a person from whether they leave the toilet seat up, to their tolerance for dirty dishes in the sink, to not turning off the lights after they leave a room. Determine which things matter to you and let them know so they can be mindful of them. Just be aware this is a two-way street. You may have habits that are irritating to the other person. So be ready to make some compromises.

Speak Up

If there is one more thing I can tell you, it is to say something if you have a strong opinion or an issue is bothering you. Letting it fester doesn’t help anyone. Now, that’s not to say you should be bossy or demanding, but have a talk and learn where your partner is coming from as well. Understanding their side of the story might enlighten you as to why something is occurring and help rectify the problem. For instance, I got so frustrated every night when Clyde would leave the living room light on even after he was finished watching TV that I would turn it off myself, and then go to bed upset. Finally, I talked to him about it and it turned out he was leaving the light on so the house would not be too dark for safety and security. So we compromised and installed an outdoor motion-sensor light, and now he turns off the living room light at night.

So, that’s my two cents about moving in with your partner. Hope these tips can help you too, and good luck!

About the Author:

Julia Holmes is a wife and mother who is on the journey towards home ownership. Check out her YouTube videos on TTMF Home Smart.